02:14: crazy, crazy day. i apologize if this doesn't make any sense. my brain is mush.
right after i published the previous entry below, i had to attend to my mom. she was feeling faint and was vomiting. i got her ice chips and an ice pack, sent my sister an sos via yahoo messenger, woke wev up, then got mom dressed to go the emergency room. poor wev was all alone, stuck in a comically frustrating situation at the hospital. i, having had no sleep, did not want to be a useless zombie in the ER, so i stayed home on standby. some hours later, mom was released. she's much batter now.
i finally got to sleep at 5pm, but got a rude awakening 4 hours later. i found money on the dining table and was told that it was for whiny little girl. from my brother. i was shaking with rage when i found out that she called while i was asleep and asked for help from wev. although wev was willing to help her, i insisted that he keep his money and told him i would talk to her. thank god i calmed down before she came because i was ready to hurt her with things other than words. i told her that our house was open to her if she needed help. if she didn't want to stay at home. or if she wanted to leave him at any time. but i was not financing her shitheadedness.
i didn't want to be a total bitch. i tried to tell her all that i've been feeling in the past months that we hadn't spoken... thorugh few words, little gestures. i figured she wouldn't have any money for her trip back. i gave her transportation money and whatever change i had in my wallet. she said she'd call. i don't know if i'm looking forward to it.
the good end to this horrendous day? a phone conversation.
like him much?
much.
though i still am not expecting much.
i am a terribly, hopelessly romantic pessimist, aren't i?
brewed by lifecafe